Are You Still Afraid?
How do you know when you're finally ready to face what you once feared?
Elizabeth Mapes
8/16/20262 min read
I've felt myself approaching a threshold for a couple of months now.
Usually, when a shift comes, things get really uncomfortable. The old begins falling away before the new has taken shape, and much of the discomfort lives in that space between the two — in not knowing what comes next.
This shift feels different.
I can hear the rumblings of a storm in the not-too-distant future. Old triggers are coming, almost as if to ask:
Are you still afraid? Will you react from the old patterns? Or have you truly become the pillar of strength you've worked so long and diligently to become?
It feels like standing at the edge of a hurricane. I can see it. I know it's coming my way. And yet, where I'm standing, there is only beautiful silence.
The storm, too, is not without its beauty. Soon, I'll have to willingly step into it.
I have the option of avoiding it, but I've been down that road before. Avoidance would only delay the inevitable — the same lesson presenting itself over and over until I either surrendered to the task and walked through it, or it became so painful there was no longer a choice. The universe will persist until the greater purpose is served. So this time, it's both a surrender and a choice.
Unlike in the past — even just two months ago — I'm not afraid of the task before me. I don't like it. I do not want this task. But I know what I have to do.
What I'm watching more carefully now is my own attention. Can I keep my focus on my inner knowing when I'm surrounded by chaos? Can I move through confusion without becoming confused, and stand in the middle of the oldest, most painful triggers without returning to the version of myself who once felt worthless and powerless?
I know this storm is a gift I cannot control. I only need to remember that I am safe, and remain anchored in what I know.
Maybe that's what this transition is really about. Not running from the storm, but discovering who I am within it — and seeing what emerges on the other side.